Time heals everything, that’s the most blatant lie ever. What time is and always has been, is a catalyst that just reorders your priorities and by so indulges in a false appeal making you believe you’re over whatever it is that you once were so obsessed. All it is in reality a clock ticking down to set the bomb off. And what does it take to set it off? The most trivial factors.
I wonder why I started off with that conversation, maybe I was a bit comfortable, maybe I was naive, maybe I was foolish… Yeap foolish I was. It just brought back memories that I didn’t know existed in me. Years have passed without me mentioning about it, remembering it, lost like the dust in the wind.
Like a sleight of hand they magically reappeared in chronological order, I should never underestimate my memory ever again. And where does that leave me? Instead of counting my blessings I was recounting the horrors that once filled me upto the brim.
The track, the cake, the mix, the headstone, the white shirt, the tears, the lies, the deceit, the message and it kept right on. I realised the more I try to fight, well ever before I could decide to fight I’m lost. I don’t mind loosing a few battles as long as I win the war and I see no way I could emerge victorious.
It’s too late for me to ponder about it, those days are over. It’s too hard for me to not be able to forget them too and then it strikes me, words have always been my solace. I am clumsy with words but they console me, words seem to understand me like none other. They know just what to follow and make me feel just the way I want to feel.
So I return back to those words and they did embrace me like they always did, I hope the haunting memories are now back where they belong with the clock winded back ticking to explode again. I just hope it takes forever maybe not…